Thursday, October 30, 2008

Sweet Sorrow

This is getting ridiculous. We've owned the new house for a month, and we still aren't actually living there.

Want to hear something even more ridiculous? I'm still in no hurry to move. In fact, this is becoming something of a personal crisis.

I've really enjoyed going out there to play in the woods and putter around, but I've been just as happy to leave again at the end of the day. Our old place has been home for over twenty years, after all. It's familiar and comfortable, filled with happy memories and our handmade details. Until this year, I did not expect ever to leave it.

Then too, our pilot son lives here when he is in town, but he has elected not to move with us. He's looking at homes closer to the airport. I know it's past time for him to have his own place, and that having him back for this extra year has been a bonus. But I am so sad to think we will never again be all together as one family, under one roof.

The hubby is having the time of his life out there already, and he's champing at the bit to get moved in so he can spend evenings working around the place. Our younger son is ready whenever we are. I am the only one dragging my feet.

For better or worse, the moving van is reserved for next weekend. I'm trying to focus on all the new projects and possibilities ahead. There are so many things to look forward to, I know, and I should be the happiest woman on earth. But I just can't seem to let go.

Am I nuts?


spookydragonfly said...

Not at all!!...I couldn't wait to move to our woods, as a matter of fact...I was so anxious, I talked my hubby into moving before we were done building. We had no running water for almost a year! So, I was a little different in that aspect, but I went through a variety of emotions with thoughts of family three counties away! It will all fall into place! Hang in there!

Rambling Woods said...'s hard to leave all the memories of your children and a life that is being left behind. I felt the same way when we moved here after 25 years in our other house. It's bittersweet...

sallyacious said...

No. You have a home you love, where so many wonderful things happened. Just passing through rooms can trigger memories, I suspect. And you're getting ready to step into a great big adventure. As long as you have one foot in each place, you can feel like it's possible to step back if you need to. Moving is like cutting off your escape route. But it will be so wonderful to be in that new place.

MyMaracas said...

Kim, thanks for the encouraging words! I really needed to hear somebody say that it'll be OK.

Rambling, I'm relieved to hear I'm not the only one who's felt this way. Sometimes it seems like no one understands when I get all sentimental over things. Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone.

And Sally, I think you've hit the nail on the head; once we've moved in, there is no escape. And a lot of things about this move are scary. Still, I'm sure you're also right that it will be wonderful in its own way.

Thanks so much, all of you, for the tea and sympathy!

Kathy said...

Melancholy comes to mind when I think of your dilemma, but I know you'll get where you want to be. Those mixed emotions have to have their say too. Let them. And then move on to your equally wonderful home where you will build all the new memories you could hope for. ;)

MyMaracas said...

Hi, Kathy, and thanks for taking the time to reassure me that it's OK to have these conflicting feelings, and that the new home will be a good place too.